Sunday, July 8, 2012

the secret to life


I want to be married. My heart aches for a family.
I'm pretty sure that's taboo. I'm not allowed to say that, I've now classified myself as desperate and marriage hungry. I've also just made many people roll their eyes and think "hello, you're only 24, get over it."
I don't care. It's the truth.

My greatest desire, really, is to have a family. To be a mother. To work together with a loving husband to raise children. There isn't anything that I want more. (Not even the shiny new Nikon that I'm saving up for.) That being said, I have little to no control over when that is going to happen. It entirely depends on someone else's agency. I also know that the Lord has perfect timing. Deep down, I really am okay with all of that. And I do actually enjoy being single. 

My life is good. It is so good. I'm happy where I'm at, I like what I'm doing, but I do want more. And not just that I want to be married, there are other dreams and goals I have in my life. But, I'm sort of just letting myself be content and mediocre until something better presents itself in my life. (Cue knight in shining armor, please.) 

I'm single, graduated, and I can do whatever I want. I could run away to Rome, I could start my own company, I could change the world. Sometimes, it's not about making a big life change, moving, going on a fancy trip, starting a new business... not that those things aren't great ideas. Sometimes, however, it's about using the great things you're already doing to progress right where you are.

The thing is, I am happy where I'm at. I know I could also be happy doing other things. Maybe more happy. Maybe not. I think sometimes we forget to take action and try. We spend so much time learning how to be okay with what we're doing, that we forget that we have the power to choose. We are in control of our lives. We can do more, be more, become better. 

And in all reality, it's in those moments of action when the better things come. When you're progressing and trying and doing, that's when you find the best things. 


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