Saturday, January 21, 2012

how to date an engineering major

Back in September, I was chatting with one of my friends about how many of the guys on campus are Engineering majors and how chances are, most girls at USU will try to date an Engineering major at some point in their college career. Thus, "How to Date an Engineering Major" was born.

I've been researching and interviewing Engineering majors here and there since that day. I also asked for input on Facebook this past week. So, without further ado:

How to Date an Engineering Major

Disclosure: This post is intended to be more humorous than helpful. The majority of statements made are generalizations and are potentially not true of every Engineering major. Not a lot of *real* scientific research went into this post. Oh, and I did use Wikipedia. There goes all my credibility right out the window. 

First, get their attention. 
Source: quickmeme.com via Elise on Pinterest


Though the quickest way to a man's heart might actually be through his ribcage, it seems the quickest way to an Engineering major's heart is through his too-busy-doing-homework-to-make-food stomach. If you're a good cook (see also: you can make more than toast), you've got an in. 

If cooking your crush meals isn't your style, the next best way to get an Engineering major's attention is by using nerdy pick-up lines. 
  • "Being with you is like switching to polar coordinates: complex and imaginary things now have magnitude and direction."
  • "How can I know hundreds of digits of pi and not the digits of your phone number?"
  • "Excuse me, I'm attracted to you. According to Newton's laws of gravitation, you're attracted to me too."
  • "Honey, you're sweeter than 3.14159265358979323846264338327950288419716939937510582097494459230781..."
  • "Hey, can you tell me the oxidation state of this atom and your phone number?"

Once you've got their attention it's time for conversation. I've come to the conclusion that you don't have to be nerdy, you just have to be accepting of nerdy. Also, don't fake understanding of things they talk about, simply be interested in the things they explain to you. After all, "the learning curve to converse to an Engineer is a steep one." 

Nerdy things that you should act interested in include but are not limited to:
  • Mohr's Circle
  • Star Trek
  • Car Engines
  • Actually, any kind of Engine
  • Auto CAD 
  • C++
  • Algorithms (see also: Rubix cubes)


Next step: Impressing them on the date. Alexis, is married to an Engineering major and compiled this list of suggestions:
  • Ask them to help you fix something.
  • Always use a coaster.
  • Make sure your clothes match.
  • Ask them what they want to invent.
  • Tell them you built something.
  • Build gingerbread houses with them. Like woah.

Once you've reached this point, you have to realize that during the school year there are two kinds of Engineering majors: Already married Engineering Majors and single Engineering majors. So, if you've gotten yourself an Engineering major significant other (EMSO) over the break, once the semester starts you'll need to remember these things:
  • To them, homework might just be more fun than watching TV. (Unless Big Bang Theory is on.)
  • They're going to be very busy. Don't judge the success of your relationship by how much time they spend with you, but by how much of their free time they spend with you.
  • Engineers like to have fun, but not just any kind of fun. It's a lot more fun if they can do something that shows off their Engineering skills.
  • To the optimist, the glass is half full.
    To the pessimist, the glass is half empty.
    To the Engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.

When it all comes down to it, Engineering majors do often believe they don't have time for a girlfriend, but somehow many of them end up with wives. I think if you convince them you're worth their precious free time, they'll make it work. As with most relationships, be patient and "let the chips fall where they may". Your Engineering major crush might just need a little extra push. 

Or, you may just need to have this conversation:

Boyfriend

XKCD



Special thanks to: Karen and Mr. Fab for the pick up lines, James, Jaiden, Jay, Theresa, Kara, Wendy, and other facebook friends for their input, Alexis for her first-hand experience, and Sheldon Cooper for being awesome. 
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