Allow me to introduce you to my real life and blog friend, Jason. He's in my singles ward and one of the nicest, coolest, friendliest guys I have met there. You can check out his blog here.
Hello readers of Elise's Pieces!!! My name is Jason Huynh andI have been given the awesome opportunity and privilege to guest post on Elise's amazing blog. First, a little bit about myself, I know Elise through my amazing single's ward! I am the token Asian guy there and try to make FHE activities the best. I am Vietnamese, born and raised in Salt Lake and now live in West Jordan. I follow blogs religiously, and just started, well, restarted mine 2 months ago.
For you Elise's pieces readers, I will try to make this a treat. Elise asked me to post something similar to her "dear boys" posts, comprising of parts one through who knows how many dear boys posts she'll do! Anywho, I am excited to show off some of my writing skills and experiences.Please try to laugh and enjoy.
So first, a few of my dear girl sayings...
I've been noticing you, noticing me, noticing you,
are we going to do anything about it?
guy with zit in the middle of his forehead
Dear hope to be facebook friend number 132,648,
You look hot in your profile pic, will you please add me as a friend so I can stalk, I mean see more of your hot pictures?
nerd that is level 432 on farmville
Dear future girlfriend,
Why are you with that dumb jock? Real men have braces!
Dear friend of friend of a girl that I have a crush on,
I try to show off, but seem to fail, I am the one that's trying too hard.
really overconfident male
Alright, I know that they are not as amazing as Elise's, but still fun. Elise also asked me to write some advice in regards to dating. I have been around the dating scene for quite sometime, been in relationships, been heart broken more than I have broken hearts. Been used and abused. Known love, and given love. Dated several girls in and out of the singles' ward. Beaten myself up, and have wondered if I am meant to get married, I have even thought about just leaving to another country altogether, but never suicide, that's just wrong!
In the midst of all this time, I was always focusing on finding the right one, the perfect one, my soul mate. But in realizing how difficult it really was, cause think about it, I am an Asian guy living in a predominantly white, Mormon, society. Chances seem slim so I went to BYU, had some fun down there, but still no success. I was still young and I thought well I am still pretty awesome. Even though I had a lot going for me, my bishop and younger sister help me realize a great truth. That too many of us (single) peeps focus on trying to find the right one, instead of focusing on BECOMING the right one.
Another great truth I discovered in dating, was that when I was dating and everything was going right, I tended to read my scriptures more, my prayers were more meaningful, and life was all around better. When I wasn't dating, all those things would be ignored, life would go in a rut. I was living and dictating my happiness according to how successful dating was. That was a realization that just recently hit me. We need to be consistent in the simple and little things, before we can receive happiness, and not base it off of dating.
In the society we live in, it is very easy to get caught up with thinking about the future. I found that when a girl I was really interested in said yes to giving me her number and to a date, I was already planning on her being my girl friend, sad, I know! On the first date, I was already planning the second and third dates. Even though the date was fun, 'cause face it- I am a fun guy, it could have been so much better if I had focused on the now, more than the later.
On dates, ladies, please don't interrogate the guy, but relate to his responses and questions. Guys, ladies appreciate a good listener, but a sense of humor also helps so don't be afraid to joke and flirt a little. Girls can always know when us guys are trying too hard as well. Girls, you know what you want. I know that when you find a guy that you're interested in, you're already replacing your last name with his. Look for the guy that has the same kind of goals you do, a supportive guy, a guy who loves God, and is nice to everyone, but is also confident, and has direction, and knows what he wants. Guys, we all want a smoking hot girlfriend, but we need to focus on ourselves and makes ourselves worthy to have one not just beautiful on the outside, but on the inside as well. Ladies, it is always nice to say yes for a date, but if you are not interested in the guy please let him know sooner than later, delaying the inevitable only brings more pain to the guy and doesn't make it any easier on you. It wastes time and energy. Granted we are taught to be polite and say yes to date, and that we don't know what might happen, but in our defense, we have every right to be picky, for this is the most important decision of our lives, don't want to screw it up. Dating does not get easier as we get older. We start to become bitter, and question what's in store for us.
Recognizing, and realizing what potential we have is the first step. Constantly finding faults and weaknesses in ourselves and others, will get you no where. Knowing that you're never alone and that you are loved is great power. It gives us faith and hope to have relationships with others. If we can build a strong, loving, relationship with our Savior Jesus Christ, then nothing and no one can tell us that we can't have one with others. As young single adults, I often see us push away the Lord's hand when it is extended towards us, us being independent, and proud individuals feel that we can do things by ourselves and so we neglect Him. Sorry if I am too churchy!
I know that I am not perfect, none of us are, and that there is not a perfect girl out there for me, but the right one is. Last words of encouragement to you readers, don't give up!
Elise, thank you again for this awesome opportunity share my thoughts on your blog. Keep on rocking!!!